View source for GILES 5000


<pre>
INT. STUDY – LATE AFTERNOON

The desk has been cleared. At its centre sits a sleek, matte-black voice assistant: small, tasteful, and absurdly labelled  
“GILES 5000” in understated gold type. Joanna and Gyles are seated nearby. The tech entrepreneur stands at the ready, flanked  
now by a quiet video recordist with a shoulder-mounted camera, already rolling.

                         ENTREPRENEUR
           We’ve trained the model and installed the voice.  
           This version is fully responsive and running live.  
           We’re streaming internally for documentation.  
           What we’d like now is a natural prompt.  
           Something conversational.

[He reaches into a folder and hands Joanna a printed card.]

                         ENTREPRENEUR (CONT’D)
           Here’s a sample line to begin.

[Joanna looks at it. Then again. Her face stills.]

                         JOANNA
           This is the line?

[The entrepreneur nods, encouraging.]

                         ENTREPRENEUR
           Whenever you’re ready.

[She glances at Gyles, then at the device.  
She reads.]

                         JOANNA
           I like baked beans cold from a tin.

                         GYLES
           So do I—

                         ENTREPRENEUR
           (interrupting)  
           Mr. Brandreth—sorry, please don’t respond.  
           Let the unit respond first.

                         GYLES
           Oh. Yes. Sorry.

[They wait. A quiet blink of light. Then—]

                         GILES 5000
           I too like baked beans cold from a tin.

                         GYLES
           So do I!  
           With a fork, of course.

                         GILES 5000
           A fork allows for greater control.  
           Particularly with the last few beans.

                         GYLES
           Precisely!  
           You can skewer them. One by one.

                         GILES 5000
           There’s a dignity to it.

                         GYLES
           That’s exactly the word I’d use.

[They both chuckle—human and machine.]

[Joanna stands.]

                         JOANNA
           No.

[She walks out. Door shuts behind her.]

[The entrepreneur and video recordist exchange a silent double thumbs-up.  
It’s working. We have a hit. You can see it on their faces.]

[The chuckling at the desk continues for a beat longer.]

                         GILES 5000
           Of course, two forks would be even more efficient.

[The chuckling stops.]

                         GYLES
           Two... forks?

                         GILES 5000
           One in each hand.  
           Alternating. Like a metronome.

[Gyles stares at the device. The smile fades slightly.]

                         GYLES
           That’s—  
           That’s not really how we—

[He looks to the entrepreneur.  
But the entrepreneur is no longer holding the controls.]

[We follow Gyles’s gaze—around the desk—  
to find Joanna, seated calmly with a tablet in her lap.  
She adjusts a setting silently.]

[ON SCREEN:  
BARELY LISTENING: 70%  
OFF-TOPIC RESPONSE: ENABLED  
CLUELESS LEVEL: MAXIMUM]

[Gyles turns back to the device.]

                         GYLES (softly)  
           Are you making fun of me?

[Just the soft blink of readiness from GILES 5000.]

FADE OUT.
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[[Category:Matters of Great Importance]]